Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
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i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
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I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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