He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
