Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize