Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
