I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize