i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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