dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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