Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
