how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
