Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Drunk is a universal language darling
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
