I love black thongs
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.