Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes

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(248): Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes http://tfl.nu/lrst

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(256): View more from Alabama

I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.

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(256): I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light. http://tfl.nu/687c

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow

(802): View more from Vermont

Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow

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(609): Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow (802): Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow http://tfl.nu/mba8

Replies (2) Good night (1057) Bad night (2647)
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(813): View more from Florida

Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.

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(813): Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard. http://tfl.nu/8xvq

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(859): View more from Kentucky

thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.

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(859): thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that. http://tfl.nu/160n

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.

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(202): My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation. http://tfl.nu/z4sr

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(201): View more from New Jersey

at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."

(1-201): View more from New Jersey

youre welcome

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(201): at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.." (1-201): youre welcome http://tfl.nu/sjha

Replies (10) Good night (5582) Bad night (860)
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(847): View more from Illinois

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?

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(847): HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT? http://tfl.nu/wczu

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(254): View more from Texas

Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be

(254): View more from Texas

Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54

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(254): Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be (254): Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54 http://tfl.nu/ylh4

Replies (5) Good night (1639) Bad night (481)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.

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(270): No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call. http://tfl.nu/mofx

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(630): View more from Illinois

This is a rough morning for me

(577): View more from

No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.

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(630): This is a rough morning for me (577): No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma. http://tfl.nu/q4hk

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(313): View more from Michigan

we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles

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(313): we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles http://tfl.nu/5ilu

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(778): View more from British Columbia

First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work

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(778): First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work http://tfl.nu/03ii

Replies (12) Good night (2165) Bad night (265)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again

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(484): HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again http://tfl.nu/udnf

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(816): View more from Missouri

Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me

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(816): Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me http://tfl.nu/eiw2

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