Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
