yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize