Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
just tell him i said nine months
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
