Me too!
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
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He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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