My girlfriend figured out who you are.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize