Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
