so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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