Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
