Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
