I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
