AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
