Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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