Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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