I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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