He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
