I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
