I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
