you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
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his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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