If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize
