Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(951): View more from California

I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.

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(951): I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes. http://tfl.nu/5gti

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(757): View more from Virginia

6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.

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(757): 6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter. http://tfl.nu/kp9e

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore

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(617): i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore http://tfl.nu/4xlx

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(828): View more from North Carolina

You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up

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(828): You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up http://tfl.nu/y0oy

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(248): View more from Michigan

Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox

(1-248): View more from Michigan

You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.

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(248): Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox (1-248): You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities. http://tfl.nu/l19y

Replies (85) Good night (2716) Bad night (8963)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...

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(413): thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover... http://tfl.nu/lbcp

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(856): View more from New Jersey

Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock

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(856): Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock http://tfl.nu/vedt

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.

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(717): Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes. http://tfl.nu/frv8

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(732): View more from New Jersey

While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.

(732): View more from New Jersey

You said you were "testing the product for Chris."

(848): View more from New Jersey

I'm a bad man.

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(732): While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing. (732): You said you were "testing the product for Chris." (848): I'm a bad man. http://tfl.nu/x77n

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(336): View more from North Carolina

That boy needs some memories to take back home with him

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(336): That boy needs some memories to take back home with him http://tfl.nu/bmt8

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(541): View more from Oregon

Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.

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(541): Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet. http://tfl.nu/2bxm

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(310): View more from California

Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.

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(310): Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage. http://tfl.nu/meih

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(718): View more from New York

Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.

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(718): Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really. http://tfl.nu/n2d1

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(817): View more from Texas

Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing

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(817): Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing http://tfl.nu/0z5g

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(949): View more from California

We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.

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(949): We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex. http://tfl.nu/qzkw

Replies (14) Good night (2259) Bad night (229)

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