So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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