Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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