Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
It's just like the Real World with babies
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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