You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize