You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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