lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
