I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
