Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
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You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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