discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
