I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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