In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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