At least make sure they are 18
Why
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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