I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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