How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
