in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I would ride that face into the sunset
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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