Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize