How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
