And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
