I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
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I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
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Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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