i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
